The methods to their madness

14 May 2019

By Frank Scoblete

My wife has a (correct) theory about me. She believes that I believe that anyone who agrees with me is smart and those who don’t agree with me are (to put it mildly) not too bright.

Actually, I think most people think this exact way. The dumbest guy at the bar hollering and arguing about his pet theory of the world being flat is convinced that the other idiot at the other end of the bar is also smart because he agrees that the world is flat.

“So why not give others the chance to express their views about slot-play without always thinking they have to go along with your reasoning?” she asked. “I am sure Strictly Slots readers would like a kind of a man-and-woman-in-the street type of column; get to know what others think.”

Wives, huh, they are funny aren’t they? OK, much to my chagrin, sometimes they are right. So here goes. These are slot players I picked at random as I walked the slot aisles in Atlantic City at several casinos. This was mid-afternoon so I could get the “bus people” involved. The bus people are those who make midweek day trips, by bus, to the casinos.

“I have a money management system,” said Alice from Bayshore, Long Island. “I am retired and I take about 200 once a month to play quarter machines. I put all of that through once and if I am ahead I put the original amount through again. As long as I am ahead I go with the 200 but the wins I keep and don’t ever play them. My hope is to get ahead and stay ahead by doing this. Once I am behind, I take half of whatever I have left after that two hundred goes through and if I am behind after that second go-through I quit and go walk on the Boardwalk.”

Manny says he doesn’t want anyone to know that occasionally he slips down to Atlantic City to play the machines. “I love playing when I should be at work. I come down maybe twice a month. Hey, I own my own business and I can take time off if I want to. It is my guilty pleasure. I have a separate fund that I use to play the dollar machines. It is a great release. I play for about three hours and then head home. I have no preconceived ideas about how to manage my money or what exact machines I should play. I just pick one or two and go after it. It is complete fun. Then it is back to the grindstone of work.”

James and Jaime, fraternal twins from Hanover, New Jersey, are slot aficionados who play weekly. Both are retired, one from teaching and one from real estate. “I play quarter machines,” said James, the teacher. “I play $5 machines,” said Jaime, the real estate broker, who continued, “I told James to go into real estate with me but he had this notion of being a teacher and as you can see it shows in what machines we can afford to play. My wife is a slot player too. James’ wife doesn’t play. She doesn’t see why we find it so much fun.”

Neither man has any plan of machine selection; they are similar to Manny in that way. “A few hours of play is fun,” said Jaime. “I really don’t worry about the money. It is play money for me. I pick this or that machine. Whatever hits me.”

“I do have a stopping point,” said James. “I pick machines as whim moves me but if I lose in the vicinity of three-hundred dollars I am through for the day. That’s my limit. I go once every two months to the casinos for a couple of days. Usually Jaime joins me although he goes slightly more than I do.”

Rose from Toms River, New Jersey is a careful slot player. “I use your idea of playing one coin at a time on a dollar machine. I go for machines that are unlinked which are machines I think return more than the linked machines. $100 is my limit for a session, and I will play two sessions a day. I also play slow and I mean really slow. I have no problem having conversations with other slot players. I enjoy the whole scene. I want to win money, but I also know that these machines are not programmed to make Rose rich.”

Vanessa, from “a small town in New Jersey,” is a new player. “I just went to the casinos with some friends and I found the slot machines to be a fun thing. I return a lot because I keep thinking one of these days I am going to win millions. Do you think I am crazy? I don’t spend the rent and food money, so do not worry about me, but my goal is to retire on my winnings. I have about 40 years before I can retire! Seriously, those machines are another world and a great relief from the stress of work and dating and all the rest of it.”

There you have some people explaining their slot play. I don’t think any of them are idiots; although I would caution Vanessa about her plans to retire on her slot winnings — chances are that scenario will not happen.

And by the way, I still think my ideas are right. (Just don’t tell my wife!)

All the best in and out of the casinos!

Visit Frank’s website at www.frankscoblete.com. Frank’s latest books are Confessions of a Wayward Catholic!; I Am a Dice Controller: Inside the World of Advantage-Play Craps, and I Am a Card Counter: Inside the World of Advantage-Play Blackjack. Available from Amazon.com, Kindle, Barnes and Noble, e-books and at bookstores.