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Columnist Jeff Haney: Under a Bad Sign -- The Autograph Boom & Bust

So says Tom Bunevich, a nationally prominent autograph and card show promoter from 1983 to 1997, in his book "Sign This: The Real Truth About Your Sports Heroes and the Sports Autograph Industry."

When appearance fees began skyrocketing amid the memorabilia craze of the '80s, casual collectors were forced out of the picture, Bunevich contends.

"It was in the '80s that these (large) dollar figures became affixed to autographs," Bunevich said from his Tampa, Fla., home. "Once that kind of money came into play, it became a whole new ballgame."

The juiciest parts of the book are Bunevich's lists of his "top 10 jerks" and "top 10 good guys," complete with funny and illuminating anecdotes gleaned from his career as a promoter.

"Too many times we become enamored by our sports heroes, only to find that their real personalities don't measure up," Bunevich said.

For well-read baseball collectors, "Sign This" could serve as a metaphorical bookend to the cult classic "The Great American Baseball Card Flipping, Trading and Bubble Gum Book," which appeared in the early '70s and celebrated baseball nostalgia way before baseball nostalgia became a big business.

In that respect, "The Great American..." is like "Alice's Restaurant" -- a movie about The Sixties that was actually made in the 1960s.

Much of "The Great American..." consists simply of pictures of old baseball cards with smart-aleck remarks attached. ("Albie Pearson would have been, had he been only six inches taller, almost 5-11." ... "Cal Abrams was the Jewish Gino Cimoli." ... "Good night Sibbi Sisti, wherever you are.")

Bunevich's book, on the other hand, has a distinct third-act-of-"Boogie Nights" feel.

OK, so the '80s are over. Baseball memorabilia rivals the Olympic committee selection process for the undisputed title of sleaziest enterprise on earth. Where do we go from here?

"I came in at the right time," Bunevich said. "Certainly you wouldn't want to try to become a promoter today. You'd be setting yourself up for losses.

"There will always be somewhat of a marketplace, but the boom is over. It's on the downside."

Although his years in the business left him with a down-to-earth -- if not cynical -- outlook, Bunevich still has a soft spot for the baseball players affectionately known as "old-timers."

"Most of the new guys, they don't need to spend a weekend signing, because they just don't need the 10 grand," Bunevich said. "The old-timers can blend in (with fans) like another ordinary human being, they can relate to the fans, and they're more likely to sign autographs.

"They guys who played in the '50s, and before, are still tops."

As a case in point, here's what Hall of Famer Stan Covaleski wrote to me not long before his death in 1984, on a now-faded piece of loose-leaf paper, in a deliberate old-man scrawl: "Many thanks for all your kind words of my playing days in baseball of long ago."

Don't expect to receive a nice note like that from, say, Rickey Henderson -- another sure Hall of Famer, but also Jerk No. 2 on Bunevich's list.

A look at what Bunevich (signthisbook.com) has to say about a few guys with links to Las Vegas and/or gambling ...

Rollie Fingers: The local resident evidently just missed the good guy list. "He's courteous, friendly and accommodating, and willing to go the extra mile for autograph seekers," Bunevich writes.

Harmon Killebrew: The Killer, who often makes special appearances in Las Vegas, is Good Guy No. 2, behind only Brooks Robinson. "Killebrew's got class -- definitely the most of all the 500 home run club members."

Pete Rose: Derby Lane's most famous denizen is Jerk No. 8. Rose has a head-down, all-business demeanor at signing sessions, but "somehow, he always notices the good-looking women and exchanges conversation with them."

Reggie Jackson: A frequent Las Vegas visitor, Reggie earns spot No. 6 on Bunevich's list of jerks. Bunevich relates a story of Reggie running up hundreds of dollars in mysterious charges on a hotel expense account during a weekend signing appearance.

"Examining the bill, I found a few charges for 'services' for $100," he writes. "I could only imagine what they were." Well. Good night Sibbi Sisti, wherever you are.

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