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A Nice Little Earner

Well, Namblers, here's a chance to win some free money and completely stuff up a research project at the same time. It seems a "major betting and gaming company in England" (my money is on William Hill Bookmakers) is sponsoring a on-line survey to see if people want to Namble. They have put up some cash and made this deal what the British call "a nice little earner." That "little earn" being "a prize of a thousand pounds (around $1,500 greenbacks) in prizes in sporting tickets/hospitality" or "In the case of suitable events or access to countries being unavailable, a cash alternative of £500 ($800 or the equivalent in another currency) will be offered."

It's a quick survey to do (they say around 6 or 7 minutes). They say "A lucky winner will be drawn from the completed surveys after the close of the survey on Sunday, 1 June 1997," so you had better get a move on.

Our English cousins say, "This survey is designed to gauge the interest in on-line gambling. Entry is open to everybody, whether or not you have any interest in these services. Even if you have never played the lottery or placed a bet, you can complete the survey." Their objective seems to be figuring out if they can make some money out of us Netizens.

Here is the problem. Who do you think reads RGT? Huh? I mean, other than the FBI, the NAAGS, the AG's and the Treasury Department? Namblers, of course! (Who did you think reads an on-line gambling 'zine...Jerry Falwell and the Moral Majority?) (Then again,.... you never know).

So, now that I am sending all you 'whiskey swilling', 'poker playing' Namblers over to England to do the survey, what do you think will happen?

Well, when they ask questions like this:-

Forgetting the Internet for a moment, are you interested in gambling/betting in general?

Yes - No

or this:-
Which of the following have you played or bet on? (Tick all that apply)

Lottery
Horse/Dog racing
Betting on sports
Slot machines
Casino games
Other

Or this:- How often would you play/bet/gamble on-line?

More than once a week
More than once a month
More than twice a year
More than once a year
Less than once a year
N/A (Never)

Well, oh boy! Are they going to get a wild result! When they analyze the results, it's gonna' seem like everyone on the Internet is a Nambling Nut! They will be so happy :-) They will have board meetings and convince themselves to invest millions in new web sites. They will show all the merchant bankers the survey results.

Their figures will show that 85% want to gamble on the Internet and spend zillions ever week. They will say "think of the billions we will make!" The merchant bankers will rush of and sell shares to investors who will start planning how to spend their profits. The investors will blow their credit card limits in anticipation. The Bankers will buy new Mercedes on delayed payment. The researchers will write a learned paper and present it at computer shows to show how clever they are. "Team AnchorDesk" at ZDnet will publish the results saying how little others understand the "real" Internet. Ahhh.... I can see it now.

Meanwhile, hopefully, one of you Namblers out there will be 500 English pounds richer, and the rest of us? Well, we will all be sitting at our keyboards going.....hee, hee, hee, snicker, snicker, snicker, chuckle chuckle "Grin."

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