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The Reel Life: Killer otters edition

27 July 2017

A group of angry otters attacked a black Labrador retriever at American Lake near Seattle, shocking the dog's owner, as well as other folks who assume that otters aren't dangerous because they're small and adorable.

The dog is recovering from multiple bite wounds, but is expected to be OK.

There have been other reports of the vicious gang of otters attacking other animals around the marina at American Lake. The marina owners also report the otters stealing trout from their hatchery, because otters do not subscribe to capitalist human notions of private ownership.

State game officials have suggested the owners could get a hunting license and go kill the otters, which seems like it should be the option of last resort, after all the usual things like sending a cease-and-desist letter.

While many people report being shocked at how savage these wild otters can be, fans of the late author Brian Jacques' beloved Redwall series will recall that otters, though playful and gregarious, are skilled sailors and excellent fighters. Just about the only creature you want to cross less is a badger.

Just checking: All of our readers know that badgers are also dangerous and scary, yes? They're not all Friar Tuck from the Disney version of Robin Hood? OK, good.

Anyway the moral of the story here is that nature is terrifying, so we recommend keeping away from wildlife in general. It's much safer to stay indoors and play online slots.

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The Reel Life: Killer otters edition is republished from